Fear Setting for Stress Reduction

fear setting

Fear Setting for Stress Reduction


Fear setting is an amazing tool that can be used to get over almost any kind of fear or doubt in your mind. Mental health professionals, self-help gurus and productivity experts recommend it as a means to get over fears of taking chances. For example, if you are someone who is thinking about branching out and starting their own business, you might find that fears of failure are holding you back. This is where fear setting would normally come in, to help you overcome those doubts and take a real chance on your future and on your dreams.
But this amazing emotional regulation tool has other uses too. Specifically, it can be a highly powerful tool for overcoming doubts and fears that might be causing you stress. If you’re afraid of losing your job, of your relationship ending, or of your credit score becoming so bad that you can’t get a loan… this can cause you underlying chronic stress.

The solution?

Fear setting, in order to remove those doubts and focus on what matters.

How to Use Fear Setting

The idea behind this tool is that you are going to write down all the things you find are making you feel stressed. Then, you will look at them and assess on a case-by-case basis, whether they’re really worth stressing about. Are they actually likely to cause you problems, or are you worrying for nothing? For example, often the things that bother you in a relationship are an image of our biggest fear in the relationship. Many fears involve abandonment by a partner. If you’re stressed about work, that often boils down to angst that you might lose your job.

Write down these fears then and then rate them each on a scale of 1-10 for their likeliness. And think about each point. How likely are you really to lose your job? Bearing in mind it’s actually illegal to fire someone without a good reason? Would your partner of 5 years really leave you over one argument? Likewise, come up with a contingency plan for each fear. What would you do if you lost your job? Worst case scenario it might mean moving back in with your parents, but probably you’d find something else faster than that.

fear setting

The moral of the story?

Most of our scary thoughts are inflated in our minds. Once we learn this, they become much more manageable!


Primal Scream Therapy … Pseudoscience or Genius?!

primal scream therapy

Have you ever screamed … out loud?  Not sitting in grid-locked traffic, not at your partner arguing over who locked the keys in the car, but a raw, guttural, agonizing scream that came from somewhere deep inside you, that you have become totally disconnected from?  A scream so jagged and saturated in pain, that the very release of it left you completely numb and void of every other human emotion?  It felt almost PRIMAL! 

This release leaves you utterly spent … standing in what is only the whispers of repressed emotions, rage and pain that you had buried deep for years. 

While there is an endless array of therapies that have been long accredited and recognized for their success in helping patients deal with repressed emotions and pain, connected to traumatic childhood events, Primal Scream Therapy is one I had not heard of till only recently.  And it has me intrigued as heck!

For every therapist who praises it, there are those who oppose it and want to debunk it, labelling it as pseudoscience. 

What is Primal Scream Therapy

Primal Scream Therapy was created by Dr. Arthur Janov in the late 1960’s and was publicly introduced in the 1970’s with his book The Primal Scream

While most psychologists can agree, at least to some extent, that mental illness can often be the result of, or associated with unresolved, traumatic childhood pain, that tends to be where the cordial conversation ceases. 

Janov claimed that this trauma and pain can be healed, by allowing a patient to re-experience those incidences and that pain FULLY.   And in that safe environment ,feel those emotions and release that pain through spontaneous, unrestrained and oftentimes intense screaming, yelling and sobbing. 

Seems to me that releasing deep pain has tremendous potential to heal, rather than swallowing emotional bile for years.

Be As Loud As You Want With The Scream Box … No One Will Know!

scream box

What is a Scream Box? When is the last time you let out a massive scream?  I mean a raw, guttural, emotionally charged & intense scream!  The kind that leaves you with sweat on your brow, your skin tingling with electricity and ultimately, totally emotionally spent?!  Yeah … THAT kind of scream!  Felt good right?  Correction … it felt freaking amazing!

Scream Box Therapy

What is it about screaming that feels so good?  Well, I can only speak for myself, but this loud vocal exertion of emotion is incredibly cathartic and healing.  I mean, c’mon … how much can I, or anyone for that matter, be expected to keep bottled up inside, without eventually exploding all of THAT out?!  It’s a serious question and one I really want you to think about.

There plenty of research to support screaming as a credible therapy, to deal with trauma, pain, anger, anxiety, fear, etc.   For many people it simply works … and well.

The problem with screaming out loud as an emotional and therapeutic release is that, unless you have a place to go and do this that is private and/ or safe to do so, you really can’t.  And heaven forbid you just say F**K IT and scream yourself senseless … you have about 6 minutes before law enforcement is showing up on your doorstep with A TON of questions!

Solutions!!!

This is where a scream box can be your saving grace.  The scream box allows you to be as loud, as raw and as intense as you need to be.  The beauty in the design is that it stays within your own space.  And trust me … I’ve tested this out.  I live in a small apartment complex and not once did anyone show up at my door thinking I’d been brutally attacked.

The scream box?  Honestly … it’s a great tool to just let it ALL OUT!

Do You Struggle with Anger?

Anger Management

Anger is a normal part of the human emotional experience. However, sometimes how we manage our anger can be destructive. Most people learn how to deal with anger as a normal part of growing up based. Our parents model and teach us these tools. Unfortunately not all people, were modeled or taught healthy anger management tools. Without good emotional regulation tools, anger can become overwhelming.

Own Your Anger

The first important step in managing your emotions, is recognizing that you need some in the first place. This is often the hardest step in anger management recovery. Shame and guilt are negative feelings that are often associated with poor emotion management. It is important not to get caught up in these feelings. Shame can a huge barrier to anger recovery. Accepting personal responsibility and taking steps towards recovery is the best solution to preventing further pain.

Think carefully about your life.

  • Do you often shout at and hurt the ones you love the most?
  • Do your loved ones try to avoid you, maybe leaving the room whenever you enter or going to their bedrooms when you get in from work?
  • Have you had problems at work because you were unable to control your emotions?
  • Have you ever had the police involved in your anger management?

If any of these situations sound familiar, then the chances are that you do have an emotional regulation problem.

Quick And Dirty Tools

There are a number of techniques available which can help you to take control control your frustration. Emotion management can be as simple as acknowledging the problem and mastering some simple emotional regulation techniques. Some of these tools include counting until calm, squeezing ice in your fists and exercise. However, in more severe cases it will be necessary to attend therapy, hire an emotion coach, or attend psycho-educational workshops.

The Next Step Is Yours

Think carefully about your life. Do you often shout at and hurt the ones you love the most? Do your partner and/or children often try to avoid you, maybe leaving the room whenever you enter or going to their bedrooms when you get in from work?  Have you had problems at work, or worse still, with the police, because you allowed your anger to get the better of you?  If any of these situations sound familiar, then the chances are that you do have an anger problem and you need to address it for the sake of you and all those around you.

Anger is a normal part of the human emotional experience. However, sometimes how we manage our anger can be destructive. Most people learn how to deal with anger as a normal part of growing up based. Our parents model and teach us these tools. Unfortunately not all people, were modeled or taught healthy anger management tools. Without good emotional regulation tools, anger can become overwhelming. Angriness may be an issue in your everyday life if you let it be. Not only does it interrupt your work and play, but it may hurt you when you least anticipate it. Anger has an underhanded way of making itself known in the rarest of situations, and most you do not have any control over.